I am no stranger to struggle. Having been a business owner during the 2008 financial crisis and most recently the global pandemic, I’ve relearned time and time again that difficult situations will always arise. And if you aren’t prepared for it, it can take you out.
I am fortunate to have been exposed to tough times, which in turn has taught me that resilience is the key in all this. We are living in a time where we cannot control much. The pandemic has completely altered our daily lives, created economic uncertainty, political and social turmoil, and kept many away from their necessary support systems. But while it is easy to succumb and feel helpless, we can always control our greatest asset: our mindset.
The truth is, there is no way to avoid adversity, sorrow, grief, or distress. It’s a part of being human. Resilience allows you to overcome the inevitable, and if you learn to build it, you will be able to see the light at the end of the tunnel no matter how distressing the scenario.
In my many years of falling down and getting back up, I’ve learned a few key lessons that have allowed me to persevere through even the most difficult situations.
1. Don’t be scared to bat.
Today’s society is all too familiar with immediate gratification. Whether it be same-day Amazon delivery, or social media apps designed to trigger your brain’s dopamine receptors, there isn’t much that doesn’t happen with the click of a button. Because of this, many people are programmed to avoid adversity. But, as cliche as it sounds, success doesn’t come without struggle.
Truthfully, much of business isn’t glamorous. There will be disagreements and problems that make your brain hurt, people who upset you, and exhausting logistics. Those thorns scare a lot of people off, but passion tips the scale. Don’t let fear dissolve your willpower to jump over hurdles.
After all, the biggest failure is not trying. Personally, I would rather strike out than not be playing ball. If you were to count how many times I’ve struck out throughout my career, I would bet my batting average is only .100 or .150. One out of every ten shots, I’ll make it. And the things that are especially fruitful, that’s even less. My point is, if you want to hit a home run, you need to be playing ball.
2. Desire has to be greater than fear.
If you want to break through today’s programming, you need to want something first. The secret sauce to being successful is likely something you’ve already heard before, “Find something you love.” But the missing second part to that is you have to want it more than anything — it has to be insatiable.
If you have an insatiable appetite for success, nothing will ever get in the way of that, not even fear. For most people, this is the limiting factor. It’s not that they don’t have dreams; it’s that their fear of failure is greater than their desire for success.
Whatever your desire is, it has to be something you think about when you go to bed, when you’re dreaming, and when you wake up. You know it’s insatiable when it’s that. It could be dreaming of a gold medal from the Olympics, to make your first million, or it may not be monetary at all.
If you haven’t found that burning passion yet, don’t be discouraged. I did not grow up thinking I would be in the car business, and it took me many years of failing before I found something that truly sparked that desire. Passion is a process defined by curiosity, exploration, and invested time. Don’t be afraid to try new things. You never know what will stick.
3. Wrong decision is healthy.
Cicero once famously said, “More is lost by indecision than wrong decision. Indecision is the thief of opportunity. It will steal you blind.” When you sit at home and think about decisions too long, fear and doubt will start to creep in. If you truly want to conquer your fears, you need to make some choice, and sometimes that leads to making the wrong choice.
For the most part, wrong decisions are rarely ever bad. Of course, if you decide to blow thousands of dollars at a casino during a party weekend, that might not be the smartest choice. However, if you are making a choice with good intentions or to improve your life, the worst possible outcome is never all that bad. In fact, you’ll gain invaluable experience, which gives you the ability to analyze, change, and move forward. Nobody learns anything when they’re leading the race. It’s always when you’re behind where you sharpen your skills.
In your career, you are going to make mistakes. It is a fact of life. The best thing you can do for yourself is be prepared mentally. A lot of people get taken out of the business for two reasons: mental or financial. But remember, finances are easy to control. Even if you are against the wall seriously financially, you can always figure a way out. The same applies to the mental side, but I find it is where people fail the most. It is usually an issue of giving up, which as mentioned, is the ultimate failure.
One of my greatest mentors, Roger Penske, who helped co-sign my first dealership, always told me, “Loose was fast and tight was slow.” In the racing world, he meant that if your car felt like it was almost on the edge of being out of control, that’s when you were the fastest. My point is, in business, to take that risk and make that decision, you’ve got to be a little fearless. Don’t focus on what can go wrong, focus on what can go right and mitigate what could go wrong as far as your loss. You’ve got to prepare for that and accept that. It is a part of strategy.
4. Look back, but don’t dwell.
I have been blessed with a short memory. While some may think that’s a liability rather than an asset, hear me out. When you hit rough times, you’re either looking back or looking forward. If you’re looking back and dwelling on what’s wrong, you will have a hard time coming up with a clear idea on how to improve your position.
I do not wake up in the morning and think about breakfast. I do not think about what I’m going to do on the weekend. I wake up and it’s business, period. Strategically, good times or bad, I’m always trying to figure out where the opportunities are at and where to improve. I think that’s an asset that anybody who has accomplished anything has; tenacity and drive.
That’s not to say I have forgotten the past. There were points during 2008 where I thought for sure I would be starting over. I wasn’t scared to, but in 2009, we lost $2.5 to $3 million. I didn’t make a paycheck for almost three years. Those were challenging times, but as I look back now, I don’t feel the pain. I remember the experience, but I remember more the highlights of what I think went right versus what went wrong.
You can remember the past, but don’t dwell on it.
5. Surround yourself with people who inspire you.
I have always had the best people around me, from incredible mentors like Roger Penske to colleagues who became life-long friends like Rob Melvin, and my wonderfully supportive wife, Lorie.
When 2008 hit, not many people knew where we were, not even my family knew. We were one paycheck away from losing everything. We were able to make smart moves, many of them orchestrated by Rob Melvin. I remember having him by my side saying, “Let’s not worry about this, and let’s keep our blinders on and surge forward.” His support during this time was invaluable, and I accredit his diligence and wit to saving us during the recession.
Like other animals, humans learn from watching others. We are innately social creatures. To survive hardships, it’s vital we have good support systems. That pillar is the single most important thing to keep you going when you feel like giving up. Find support through friends, family, and coworkers. If you can’t find mentors (and even if you can), find inspiration through reading.
In life, we have a tendency to overcomplicate things. Many of the cliches we learned as children stay relevant throughout our lifetime. But as we age and the fear of losing what we have becomes larger, we forget that our mental strength can get us through anything. I now realize that my resilience has been the key to my success. And I’m confident that if I lost everything tomorrow, I’d have it back in a year. It doesn’t concern me one bit. Once you have the tools to be successful and the confidence, it’s easy to regain.
Well, not easy. But it can certainly be done.
